I know that times were hard
I know that you’ve been feelin’ down
If you only knew how I’m feelin’
For you
If I could take your pain
I wish that I could wash it all away
If you only knew how I’m feelin’
Mommy I’m sorry if my first letter made you cry
To be honest with you I don’t think that I wanna die
Sometimes I feel like that I’m cancerous in others lives
Thats probably why I drink at night and sleep ’til 4 or 5
It’s kinda hard walking through life with my distorted eyes
When I was younger I was stupid and I thought I thrived
I thought a lot about everything I said in the letter
And questioned whether or not if I was dead you’d be better
You think my shorty would be happy if I never met her
It’s too late now mommy I could never forget her
Could never forget how she told me to love
Cuz my father and my grandmother is always above
It’s glory above you know that daddy taught me to thug
And every time we was with nanny she’d bombard me with hugs (damn)
I miss ’em mommy and it’s hard to believe
That I’m grown and I don’t understand it — why did they leave?
(Better to die and sleep than never wake and sleep)
(Then linger on and dare to live when your souls life is gone)
You’ve been runnin’ around for so long
You’ve been hurting yourself too much
You keep messin’ around with darkness
You’re the one who’s losin’
You’ve been runnin’ around for so long
You’ve been hurting yourself too much
You keep messin’ around with darkness
You’re the one who’s losin’
Mommy I think that Ima try to stick around a while
I got a niece and my nephews they need me ’round a while
I think they need me cuz they hittin that age
And they ain’t tryin to speak to Lenny cuz they spittin’ they rage
And mommy speakin’ of Lenny I think my brother need me
And we Italian so you know my mother love to feed me
And it’s the little things you do for me that make it worth it
Like when I play a joint that we did and you say it’s perfect
And when Jay got knocked you knew that I was hurt
You told me put all of my heart in a song and it worked
I promised him that I’d be there when he got out the bing
You ain’t raised me to be a liar ma’ thats not my thing
I told him that I’d hold him down the whole time that he gone
they kept him locked inside a cage but thats cool cuz hes strong
so mommy keep that first letter I wrote you on the low
I think I wanna stay alive and see if I can grow
You’ve been runnin’ around for so long
You’ve been hurting yourself too much
You keep messin’ around with darkness
You’re the one who’s losing
You’ve been runnin’ around for so long
You’ve been hurting yourself too much
You keep messin’ around with darkness
You’re the one who’s losin’
(you have power and money, but you are mortal, you know you cannot escape death, but immortality can be obtained,
the legend is always the same, if others have succeeded conquering death
why must we accept it, I know where immortals live and how to obtain their
secret, we too might become wisemen. The elements of chemistry are
many, but finite, so are the techniques of enlightenment..)
I know that times were hard
I know that you’ve been feelin’ down
If you only knew how im feelin’
For you
If I could take your pain
I wish that I could wash it all away
If you only knew how i’m feelin’