From: [email protected] (Joshua Bardwell)
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Crash Test Dummies
God Shuffled His Feet Album
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Contents:
God Shuffled His Feet
Afternoons and Coffespoons
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
In the Days of the Caveman
Swimming In Your Ocean
Here I Stand Before Me
I Think I’ll Disappear Now
How Does a Duck Know
When I Go Out With Artists
The Psychic
Two Knights and Maidens
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God Shuffled His Feet
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D Bm
After seven days, he was
The people sipped their wine, and what with
So he said once there was a boy, who
The people sat wait ing out on their
G D A
Quite tired, so God said
God there, they asked him ques tions, like
Woke up with blue hair. To
Blankets in the gar den. But
D Bm
Let there be a day just for
Do you have to eat, or get your
Him it was a joy, until he
God said noth ing. So someone
G Bm G
Picnics, with wine and bread
Hair cut in hea ven
Ran out into the warm air
Asked him, beg your par don
A D G
Gathered up some people he had made
And if your eye got poked out in this life,
He thought of how his friends would come to see
I’m not quite clear a bout what you just spoke
Em D G
Created blankets and laid back in the shade
Would it be waiting up in heaven with your wife
And would they laugh or had he got some strange dis ease
Was that a parable or a very subtle joke
[Chorus]
A E A
God shuffled his feet and glanced a round at them
D A E A D G
The people cleared their throats and stared right back at him
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Afternoons and Coffespoons
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[Intro — 4/4 time, all chords 1/2 measure each]
F F F Bb F F F Bb C C C C
[Verses]
F C F Bb C
What is it that makes me just a little bit queasy
Times when the day is like a play by Sartre
Maybe if I could do a play by playback
F C F Bb C
There’s a breeze that makes my breathing not so easy
When it seems a book burning’s in perfect order
I could change the test results that I will get back
Ab Db Eb
I’ve had my lungs checked out with X rays
I gave the doctor my de scription
I’ve watched the summer evenings pass by
Ab Db Eb Fm Db
I’ve smelled the hospital hallways
I’ve tried to stick to my presciptions
I’ve heard the rattle in my bronchi
[Chorus]
F Bb
Someday I’ll have
F C
A disappearing hair line
F Bb
Someday I’ll wear
F C
Pajamas in the day time
[Extended Chorus (play 2nd and 3d time through)]
Bb F
Oh …. oh …. oh
C F
After noons will be
Bb Dm
Measured out, measured out, and
Bb
Measured with
C F Bb
Coffe spoons, and T.S. Eliot
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Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
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[Intro — 4/4 time, all chords 1/2 measure each]
Gm7 Dm7 Gm7 Dm7 Ab Bb Ab Bb
[Verses]
Cm Bb Eb
Once there was this kid who
Once there was this girl who
Once there was this boy whose
Ab Eb Bb Eb
Got into an accident and couldn’t come to school, but
Wouldn’t go and change with the girls in the change room. And
Parents made him come directly home right after school. And
Ab Bb
When he finally came back
When they finally made her
When they went to their church
Bb Eb Ab Eb Bb
His hair had turned from black into bright white. He
They saw birthmarks all over her body. She
They shook and lurched all over the church floor. He
B Eb B
Said that it was from when the cars had smashed
Couldn’t quite ex plain it. They’d always just
Couldn’t quite ex plain it. They’d always just
Bb Ab
So hard. [To Chorus]
Been there. [To Chorus, then to Bridge]
Gone there. [To Chorus, then fade]
[Chorus]
Gm7 Dm7 Gm7 Dm7 Ab Bb
Mmm mmm mmm mmm. Mmm mmm mmm mmm.
Gm7 Dm7 Gm7 Dm7 Ab Bb
Mmm mmm mmm mmm. Mmm mmm mmm mmm.
[Bridge]
Fm Eb Bb
But both girl and boy were glad
Fm Eb Bb Ab
That one kid had it worse than that ‘Cause …
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In the Days of the Caveman
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[Intro]
G#m
When you go on camping trips,
F# B G#m B
You’re stuck right out in nature.
E F#
Foraging the forests like a primate.
E F# G#m B
Using sharpened tools instead of hot plates
[Verses]
E
Your thumb and forefinger
Sometimes when I lie awake,
When I finally get to sleep,
F# B G#m B
Supposed to show you’re not a wild beast.
I hear the rainfall on my tent fly.
I dream in Techni color.
E F#
You can hear their noises at night time
I think of all the insects that are sleeping,
I see creatures come back from the Ice Age
E F# G#m B
They don’t have to keep a certain bed time.
And wonder if the animals are dreaming.
Alive and being fed inside a zoo cage.
[Chorus]
F# G#m E
See in the shapes of my body
F# G#m E F#
Leftover parts from the apes and monkeys
[Extended Chorus (play 2nd and 3d time through)]
C D
In the days of the caveman,
G Em
And mammoths, and glaciers.
C D
Bugs and trees were your food then
G Em C G
No pajamas, or doctors.
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Swimming in Your Ocean
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[Intro — 4/4 time, 1 measure per chord]
F F C Am F C
[Verses]
G C Am
When I’m sampling from your bosom
When I kneel before your bounty
When you let me taste your fingers
G C
Sometimes I suffer from distractions like
Sometimes I wonder if there could be really
I take them like fruit and as I linger, I
Fmaj7 Am C
Why does God cause things like torna does and train wrecks.
U F O’s that come from other planets.
Wonder if my seed will find pur chase in your soil.
[Chorus]
F
When I’m swimming in, when I’m swimming in your ocean,
C Am
Floating aloft on creams and scented lotion, well
F C
I can get pretty sidetracked. I hope you understand.
[Postchorus Instrumental]
Am F G Dm7 G Dm7 Bb Bb
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Here I Stand Before Me
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[Intro (simple, ain’t it?)]
Esus4
[Verses]
A E
My doctor told me that it was time for me to have my X ray.
Well, take my fingers, what to fingers really mean to me?
[Instrumental 3d verse]
F#m A Esus4
Of course, I had many night mares about the fatal day.
Oh, you can easily look them up in the dictionary.
[Instrumental 3d verse]
A E
The room was dark and my skeleton was floating on the wall.
They call them digits or techically they’re known as the pha langes.
[Instrumental 3d verse]
D G A
My voice trembles down in side me.
My joints con nected up in side me,
My, my the future lay be fore me.
D G A G D
I’m trapped way down in my body.
Way down deep inside my body.
Hey hey, deep inside my body.
[Chorus]
G A D
I, I, I, oh here I stand be fore me, but
A D
Something’s out of place here.
G A D
My mind’s eye is missing from my body.
G A D
Well, I know it’s there, but I can’t see where.
[First time through, play G and goto second verse. Second time through,
Play Bm -> B and then this bridge]
E A B
My bones shine brightly, a map of my whole body.
E A B
My vital organs just churn away in side me. Some-
E B E
Day they’re going to stop this motion, and I’ll be left with
[Then play B, D and goto the instrumental third verse.]
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I Think I’ll Disappear Now
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[Intro — 4/4 time, 4 distinct beats per chord except for [Csus4-C]
And [Dm-C], which are each 4 beats total]
Bb C F Csus4 Bb [Csus4-C] F Bb F [Dm-C]
[Vocal Intro]
F Bb F Dm
Running into you like this without a warning
C Bb C F
Is like catching a sniff of te quila in the morning.
Dm Bb
But I’ll try, I’ll try to keep my food down.
F Dm
That’s quite an aftertaste that you’ve left now that
Gm C Bb Csus4 C
You’re not a round.
[Verses]
F Bb F Dm Csus4
You can just pretend we’re not in the same room.
I’ll buy a fast car and drive it fast from here.
Well, you can bet that I’ll forget how it was then,
Bb C F
Well alright I’ll just mosey to the bathroom.
There’s a beach I haven’t seen since last year.
All the drives to your farm for the weekend.
Dm Bb
You flew by like a summer vacation
It’s far, but I like night drives
But I’ve seen the swimsuit magazines
F Dm Gm C
And you left me with TV movies and a messy kitchen
It just makes it nicer when I do ar rive.
And I’ve smelled te quila first thing in the morning.
[Chorus]
Bb C F
I think I’ll disap pear now, slip out sideways.
Bb C Am Dm
Just for a while, but un til then, I’ll stay in and sleep late. Ex —
Bb
Cuse me.
[Extended Chorus (play 2nd and 3d times through)]
Csus C Gm C
Aren’t you going to miss me?
Gm F Dm Bm F B
Aren’t you going to even say one thing to me anymore.
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How Does a Duck Know
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F
How does a duck know
C F Bb
What direction south is?
F C F Bb
And how to tell his wife from all the other ducks?
D A
You can cut a chicken’s head off
D E D A
But it will keep on running and twitching.
D E
When everything seems planned out
D E
When everything seems nicely planned out
D A E
Well the human race will come and smack your face
F
How come all my body parts
C F Bb
So nicely fit to gether?
F C F Bb
All my organs doing their jobs, no help from me.
D A
A person pulls a spider’s leg out
D E D A
To watch it keep on moving and twitching.
D E
When everything seems planned out
D E
When everything seems nicely planned out
D A E
Well the human race will come and smack your face
Bbmaj7
Satan
C F
Lives here
A Bb E
On grain and earth, rain and air.
D A
You can put me in and iron lung
D E D A
And I will keep on breathing and twitching.
D E
When everything seems planned out
D E
When everything seems nicely planned out
D A E
Well the human race will come and smack your face
D A E D
You might be dead, but you keep your head.
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When I Go Out With Artists
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[Intro — 4/4 time, each chord is 1/2 measure]
D D A E D A E D D E E
[Verses]
Bm E
When I go out with artists,
If I were David Byrne,
F#m
They talk about the language and the
I’d go to galleries and
D A
Cubists and the dadaists and I
Not be too con cerned. Well, I would
Bm E
Try to catch their meanings
Have a cup of coffee
D E A
And keep up with all of their mar tinis.
And I’d find my sur roundings quite a musing. And
E A D F#m E
I don’t know which should be my favorite paintings.
People would ask me which were my favorite paintings.
[Chorus — Second time through, goto Bridge]
D
If I could see, if I could see, if I could
A F#m
See all the symbols, unlock what they mean,
D
Maybe I could, maybe I could, maybe I
A
Could meet the artists and get to know them
F#m C E A E
Personal ly —
[Bridge — Play after second Chorus, and then goto Instrumental Bridge]
C#m A B
What if the artists ran the TV?
E A B
All the ads would be for fine scotch or whiskey
C#m B
Glenfiddich, Glenlivet,
A E A
The whole single malt family —
[Instrumental Bridge — 4/4 time, each chord equals 1/2 measure]
D D D D A A A F#m
D D D D A A (NC) (NC)
C C E E B B E
[Close — Play after Instrumental Bridge]
C#m F#
The artists of the future
G#m
Will make up new things and
E B
Different nomen clatures. And they’ll
C#m F#
Stand amongst their pictures
E
And they’ll sing and
F# B
Laugh and quote from scriptures. And
F#
When they go home,
B E G#m F#
They’ll dream of brilliant paintings.
E
If I could see, if I could see, if I could
B G#m
See all the symbols, unlock what they mean,
E
Maybe I could, maybe I could, maybe I
B G#m
Could meet the artists and get to know them personally.
E
If I could see, if I could see, if I could
B G#m
See all the symbols, unlock what they mean,
E
Maybe I could, maybe I could, maybe I
B
Could meet the artists and
D F#m B G#m D E B
Get to know them personal ly —
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The Psychic
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[Intro — 4/4 time, all chords represent 1/2 measure]
D D G G D D A A C F
A A D G G G D D D D
[Verses]
G A D
She knows the fu ture
She said her vis ions
What does she think when
A D
Like the palm of your hand.
Were a bane in her life.
She foretells a dis ease?
G C D
She knows your past like the
She could not con trol them, they
Would she keep it a se cret if
Gsus2 D
Lay of the land. The
Kept her up nights. I
Death stood be fore me
A D
First time she met me
Know what you’re thinking
What could some cards hold
G D
She saw right through me, some
Haven’t been drinking.
Where is her foothold?
G A
Cards and a cane in her hand. [To Chorus]
She knew things that cut like a knife. [To Bridge]
Can I escape what she sees? [To Ending]
[Chorus]
A
And she said,
D G
All the years that have come to pass and
D A
All the years that shall be
C F A D Gsus2
I see here right be fore me.
[Bridge]
D Gmaj7 Dadd2 G D
A Bm
Will there be earthquakes and
Em7 A
Great tidal waves?
G D G A
Can she see back to the dinosaur days? How
D G D G
Can she fore see just by squinting at me? And
Em7 Bm Am A G A D G D
Can she see me naked in her mind’s eye
[Ending]
A
And she said,
D G
All the years that have come to pass and
D A
All the years that shall be
C F A D Gsus2
I see here right be fore me.
C F A D G D
I see here before me.
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Two Knights and Maidens
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[Editor’s note — this song has some screwy chords … good luck playing
It — I figured it out by myself … uh yeah, that’s the ticket! 🙂 ]
[Chord definitions:
Aadd2 x 0 2 4 2 0
Badd4 x 2 4 4 4 0
F#m(add4) x 4 4 2 0 0
C#m x 4 6 6 5 4
Esus4 0 2 2 2 0 0
F#m7 x 4 2 2 2 2
[Intro — 6/8 time, each chord is 1 measure]
Aadd2 E Badd4
[Vocal Intro — 6/8 time]
F#m7(add4) D E Aadd2 Em
Once there were two knights and maidens.
C#m B
They’d walk to gether
C D G
Out in the gar dens
E A E Esus4 E
In all kinds of weather.
[Verses — 6/8 time]
F#m7 D E Em
The knights always pestered the maidens
The knights took the potions gladly
The knights only laughed at the tigers
C#m B
To love them to gether
They laughed at their visions
They thought they were visions
C D G E A E
Out in the gar dens and they could watch each other
But outside the gar den tigers smelled them together.
Out in the gar den the maidens watched them together.
A E
Watch each other [To Chorus]
Smelled them together. [To Chorus]
Watched them together. [To Ending]
[Chorus]
F G C F Am
The maid ens had other plans for the two knights
Bb C
They’d give them potions
F Bb
And make them see dreams and lights.
[Ending]
Am7 G
Ah —
C F Am
But for the two knights.
Bb C F
Ah but for maidens who gave to them
Bb F Bb
Dreams and lights.
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Joshua Bardwell | «May be going to hell in a bucket, baby
Internet: [email protected] | But at least I’m enjoying the ride!»
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