Lacking sleep and food and vision
Here I am again, encamped upon you
Floor, craving sanctuary and
Nourishment, encouragement and
Sanctity and more.
The streets seemed very crowded,
I put on my bravest guide —
I know you know that I am acting,
I can see it in your eyes.
In the harsh light of freedom I know
That I cannot deny that I have wasted
Time, have frittered it away in idle boasts
Of my freedom and idelity, when simpler
Words would have profited the most…
… it isn’t enough in the end, when I’m
Looking for hope.
Through the organ-monkey screams as the
Pipes begin to spit
Still he’ll go through the dance routines
Just as long as he thinks they’ll fit,
Just as long as he knows that it’s dance,
Smile — or quit.
Like a monkey I dance to a strange tune
When all of those years I’ve longed to lie
With you but have bogged myself down in
The web of talk, quack philosophy
And sophistry —
At physically I’ve always baulked, like the
Man in the chair who believes it’s beyond
Him to walk.
I’ve been hiding behind words,
Fearing a deeper flame exists,