Hello Bobby my old friend.
It’s good to see you once again
How’s your mother, how’s your aunt?
How’s your father’s skin diving suit?
I’ve got something you should see
Back at my place; come with me
I’ve got some brand new furnishings
Plus 99 Dead Baboons
99 dead baboons
Sitting in my living room.
Not too functional it seems,
But quite a conversation piece.
This one’s Jake; that one’s Dinah;
There’s big Ned in my recliner.
No it’s not a lazy boy.
Can’t you see it’s a dead baboon?
How they got here I’m not sure;
Woke up one day, there they were.
Luckily i’ve got a lease
Allowing pets if they’re deceased.
I’m just thankful they’re not apes,
‘Cuz apes would clash with the drapes.
No more napkins at my parties-
Wipe your hands on a dead baboon.
Dead baboons are lots of fun;
Playing water balloons I’ve always won.
You can keep your dead giraffes and swine-
I’ll take dead baboons every time.
There’s just one problem I have found:
It’s finding Purina Dead Baboon Chow.
But what a happy snorkeling device…
With 99 dead baboons.