Internet relationships are not real
Your heart people steal but identities conceal
So here’s a tale of warning for girls and boys
Laptop computers can be dangerous toys
What do you like?
I like to go on dates and I like to stay up late
I live in San Francisco and hang on the Haight
See I’m really forty-seven, I have kids and a wife
I weight 300 pounds and I really hate my life
I only have one leg and I like to sniff glue
It’s not normal to have an Internet girlfriend.
Online relationships are really just pretend
Unplug your heart, upgrade your system.
Get, get off the Internet
Bob went on MySpace for hours a day.
Talking to girls from Moscow to LA
But people can surprise you from behind a screen
Listen to this verse and you’ll see what I mean
I checked out your pics and I like your smile
We can message each other again and again
Join my groups and guess my age!
You can’t be in high school you’re just too hot
I hope they inspire you and give you a smile
Susie sent Bob pics that were borderline obscene
The cops showed up at his door — she was only 16
If you don’t believe us here’s a final story
About a boy named Marcus and his online girlfriend Lori
Behind the monitor, truth is hidden from your eyes
Marcus didn’t know but he was in for a surprise
I don’t know what you look like, and I want to see your face
I’m a guy who pretends to be a girl through email
Living life behind the screen is a total waste of time!
Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships)