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Excuse me trooper  will you be needing any packets 
today? Yo  B  don't be throwin' on my jacket  ok? 
Cool  just trying to get your attention 
So you can take a look at this invention 
Now peep these  I got some more in my jacket 
[Man  what are these  condoms?] Uh uh: sex packets 
It's like a pill  you can either chew it up 
Or like an alka seltzer  dissolve it in a cup 
And get this: see the girl on the cover? 
You black out, and she becomes your lover 
[You're trippin] no, I'm serious, these are authentic 
[Yeah, well I don't take hallucenogenics] 
Wrong again, my man, this is way more real 
But since you know everything, I'll make someone else a deal 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
[Well now you got me curious, I'm kind thinkin bout buyin it] 
Three for ten dollars, it can't hurt to try it 
[Well what exactly do I get?] 
Well read what it says, look at the picture [Bet 
It says Chinese girl, age 17, waist 24, hips 33, 
Hmmm, this one here says young black virgin 
Man this is crazy, I'm gonna have to splure an 
get me a few of these things. How long do they last?] 
Well it depends, let's see 
These cheap ones here are ten minutes 
But these are extra power, they last about a half an hour 
And these here sell for bout 40 
'Cause you get two girls [Yeah it says orgy] 
Right, and if you're married, it's no big deal 
You're not cheating at all, you're just poppin a pill 
And if your wife's got a headache and wants to hit the sack 
It's cool, take a packet fool 
Biochemically compacted sexual affection 
Now here, take a look at my selection 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
[OK, I want these two boxes of three 
And give my blondy here, and that one that says orgy 
And, by the way, I need something for my woman] 
Sure, I got guy packets [Cool, give me some of em] 
Now let me tell you how to take it: 
Either sit of lie down, and you really should be naked 
Otherwise you're gonna mess up your clothes, know what I mean? 
This is more then just a dream 
It's very realistic and it's gonna blow your mind 
So be careful: only take one at a time 
And never take one behind the wheel 
You'll black out and hit a pole [Cool, let's make the deal] 
These are 40, these are 80, and this one here is 10 
Just give me a hundred dollars, I'll call it even 
But don't pull your money out yet, see 
There's one or two narcs in this area that sweat me 
Over here, [Yeah, this looks kinda cool 
20, 40, 60, 80 a hundred, shmoove] 
Here's my number, in case you need to reach me again 
And remember, you need to be as safe as you can 
There's only one thing safer then using your hand 
Dial that beeper number, and call the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man 
Yeah he's the packet man

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