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Cursive — The Recluse

I wake alone
In a woman’s room I hardly know
I wake alone
And pretend that I am finally home
The room is littered
With her books
And notebooks
I imagine what they say, like
‘shoo flie don’t bother me’
I can hardly get myself out of the bed
For fear of
never lying in this bed again
oh christ
I’m not that desperate, oh no,
oh God, I am
how’d i end up here to begin with
I don’t know
why do i start what I can’t finish
oh please don’t barrage me
with the questions
to all those ugly answers
my ego’s like my stomache
it keeps shitting what i feed it
or maybe i don’t want to finish anything
anymore
maybe i can wait in bed till she comes home
and whispers
«you’re in my web now,
I’ve come to wrap you up tight
till it’s time to bite down»
I wake alone
in a woman’s room i hardly know
I wake alone
and pretend that i am finally home

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