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Now this may sound disgusting an' like very gross 
But it's sure to have your trippin' 
So y'all listen close 
It's not bright as the sun or sweet like sugar 
But it's rather on the bug tip and it's called Pickin' Boogers 
Now what I'm emceein' might not seem kosher to you 
But it's still somethin' we all have to do 
So go up your nose with a finger or two 
And pull out one or a crusty crew 
Yo, don't try to front like it's so gloomy and gray 
'Cause we all pick our boogers sometime every day 
Whether out in the open or on a sneak tip 
With a finger, tissue, or even a Q-Tip 
Take it from the Biz Markie because I'm jokin' 
And also, remember this slogan 
"Hey, ma, what's for dinner? 
Go up your nose and pick yourself a winner" 
Pickin' Boogers 
Pickin' Boogers 
Let me tell you what happened on the train, man 
I was coolin' one say with my partner Kane 
Headed up to the rooftop, ridin' the D train 
When the man sittin' next to me was so profane 
He'd stick his finger up his nose, then do a drain 
(You should 'a moved) 
I was just about, but al of a suddern, homeboy just pulled out 
A big, green, slimey - naw, I'm not even gonna say it 
But it weighed a good pound if you tried to weigh it 
He sat there for a while with it in his hand 
So I tried to play cool like a normal man 
So I laid my head back to catch a quick nap 
All of a sudden he plucked it dead in my lap 
Now Kane sat there laughin' like it was all a joke 
But a brother like Biz Markie had almost choked 
So I dug up my nose and pulled out about five 
And plucked every last one of them dead in his eye 
Then the man jumped up and said what's wrong with you 
And wiped 'em off his face and said I can't mess with you 
Like if I did somethin' that was so full of shame 
But yo, you got to know the name of the game 
Pickin' Boogers 
Pickin' Boogers 
Now let me take you trippin' dow memory lane 
Back in public school with my partner Kane 
When I was class clown and he was my brotherr 
Sittin' at the desk, pluckin' boogers at each other 
Never do our work as we were supposed 
'Cause we was too busy diggin' up our nose 
And in the lunch room, we would talk about rude 
God forbid the person that had to leave his food 
No matter who you are, we didn't give a damn 
We even put teachers down with the program 
Whether it was a woman or if you're a man 
We put boogers in our fingers then shake your hand 
Catch anyone from anywhere 
But the best part about it's catchin' Kane out there 
Especially we're out playin' ball in the gym 
I put boogers on the basketball and pass it to him 
Now we're grown up and things have changed 
But we still be playin' the Pickin' Boogers game 
Just last night when Kane was gettin' ready 
I slippped a litte green one inside his spaghetti 
Pickin' Boogers 
Pickin' Boogers 
Let me tell you what happened with this girl 
One night at Latin Quarters, I was standin' at ease 
And saw a gorgeous yound lady that I wanted to skeeze 
I didn't show enough that I really did want it 
So, no half-steppin', I pushed up on it 
Pulled out the gold cable and a knot that was fat 
Had a spotlight beamin' on my Biz Markie hat 
But when she stepped in the light and she got real close 
I saw a teeny-weenie booger on the tip of her nose 
She was dressed real def and her body was hook 
But that dried-up boogeer just ruined the look 
I wanted to tell her about it but I couldn't be bold 
So I played it off and said, "That's a cute green mole" 
I was hopin' from that she wuld wipe it away 
But she didn't do nothin', I guess she wanted it displayed 
I said, "Before you get my number I don't mean to dis you 
but write it in your hand because you're gonna need the tissue"

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